The Fear of Love

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, what will you do as the fear of love grows stronger?

Philophobia can be defined as the fear of love and has been described as one of the most “unusual fears” that people have. It is known to be more common in women than in men. Philophobia can lead to other fears, such as xenophobia, and can cause you to ostracize yourself from others, become more introverted, or become depressed. Often, it is triggered by the bitter memories of an earlier engagement or marriage. However, philophobia is triggered for different reasons. Some people are too ashamed of being rejected by their potential lover. Others have been divorced and do not want to feel heartbroken ever again. Others who grew up with parents in a “bad relationship” may fear getting into the same situation and may avoid love altogether.

When exposed to a loved one, common symptoms of philophobia include:

  • Being Constantly Uptight
  • Panic Attacks/Extreme Anxiety
  • Increased Heart Rate
  • Dizziness/Nausea
  • Shortness of Breath
  • An Intense Desire to Avoid Interactions with a (former) Loved One

Exposure to the lover whom you may fear can gradually help you to overcome your fears. Supportive friends, counseling, therapy, and even medication have been known to help reduce the effects of or completely get rid of the fear of love. There are also many anonymous forums and websites where others like you are struggling with their fears, and you can receive advice from others who know about philophobia and who can help.


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